Tuesday, October 8, 2013

October Memoir-And-Backstory-Blog-Challenge - He was a beautiful 'man'

October Memoir-And-Backstory-Blog-Challenge
created and hosted by Jane Ann McLachlan


He was a beautiful 'man' 

He was a beautiful man
he bought his own gas
for his own car
that wouldn’t go in reverse
unless you got out and pushed
which he asked me to do
on our first ride
and I did
I should have known
long before that vein
started throbbing in his
temple and his beautiful
long strong fingers
back handed my lip
sending the mug I held - flying
ceramic pieces and black coffee
spattering my new-for-college-skirt
Then he cried for the first time into my lap
on his knees, talking crazy talk
as I patted his back, and calmed him down
Later I cleaned up the mess
Put ice wrapped in a white dish towel
on his knuckles where my teeth had scraped flesh
I should have known
He was a boy and I a girl of seventeen
On Independent Study


  1. Whew! A rough start to relationships. beautifully written - I love the ending line - "On Independent Study'. Clever.

  2. \the section about soothing his hand because it was hurt on your teeth was brilliant. It so sums up this kind of relationship in a nutshell. bravo.

  3. why is it that in abusive relationships, the victim always ends up comforting the abuser?

    1. Wouldn't be quite as abusive otherwise :). Part of the "dance"

  4. You capture the complexity of hope, desire, hurt, disappointment here. Ironic and fitting last line.

  5. I like how you lead the reader from being charmed by him to being concerned about him, and about her with him.

  6. I think you hit just the right note between sadness, reflection and melancholy. I like the way you twist education to include that of ourselves and others.